We all age by time.

Age is felt building in you. Making you weaker mentally & physically.

Age is time. All the experiences that are in time that one goes through. The good ones. The bad once. The worst ones. It keeps on adding to your life. It slowly becomes a baggage.

The baggage of time goes on weighing heavier. Only he can feel the weight of his own age.

Then comes the time, the high, to get old, to climb down. Only understood when the baggage is already too big. You know you are coming down.

You can do nothing. Most of the time it is something that you yourself have done that is making your climb down faster. You get unsettled, scared & tensed. You try to escape but only end up adding further baggage. Making the climb down faster.

There is no alternative. The brain or perhaps the soul knows. Only option is to accept, cool down, sober up and leave everything to fate, to time. There is no point acting and trying to make things better. Time's already up. The point is in survival. It is about getting used to the slide of time.

It is about feeling the age building in you. Acknowledging it. We all have to.

Love

Quite amusingly, I don't know how to love someone.
It seems, I always go overboard.

Quite interestingly, you have to measure love by teaspoons before giving.
Else its too sweet. 

Love is losing credibility.
In my heart.

Some say, I mix love, admiration, respect, pity.
Others complain, I keep everyone on the same pedestal of love.

Quite frankly, I am a lover turned cynic today.
Thank heavens that my loving ways work for Monali.

Blank Pages

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 28; the 28th Edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. The topic for this month is 'BLANK PAGES'.

I have been a blank page through out my life.
I am happier!

I get baffled by many mysteries. Mysteries that I can't logically fathom. Mysteries that I cant google about. One of such a mystery is quite funny actually. It is probably a mystery to no one else. It is about our memory.

How do people remember things when the time and context have changed? In other words, how do I remember to bring potatoes on my way to home from office? How do I remember to call someone when I tell him or her, 'I will call you back in 10 minutes'?

I am not some kind of Ghajini heritage material. I do remember things. I remember what I read. I remember the movies that I loved. But I dont remember illogical and non-contextual things.

How do you link 'going to the loo at office' and 'picking up the mobile phone from your desk' logically?

It scares me to death when my boss tells me that we should learn from experiences. I have no clue if I am learning from my experiences. Of course, I am a better professional with education and time. But that was not intentional. It was not because I remembered the mistakes I had made. It is because of my hardwork, passion, urge for knowledge, better intuition and sharper instinct.

Initially, I would get get very frustrated with my forgetfulness. As I grew up, I found that forgetfulness has its benefits. I dont carry baggages of bad memories (or good memories) with me. I am not cynical about life in general. People know me as a happy person.

As we grow old, we learn from our experiences (perhaps, more from our bad experiences) and we get cocooned in our own self beliefs about what life is and how people are. We form opinions basis some incidents, about our own extended family members, and hold grudges till the day we die.

I hardly have such issues.

Sometimes, I think of becoming more careful with people who I know, would not think good about me. But I cant remember my resolve when I am dealing with those people the next time. I just go with the flow of instinct in that particular transaction with that person. There is distinct benefit to this, because I didnt have a pre-conceived notion about how the transaction would go.

It is you who would suffer by the sight of the enemy. The enemy perhaps would not even care. So the problem is when you start dis-liking someone. It does not really matter when people dislike you. For me, I hardly dislike anyone. Even if I do, I dont remember it unless I get a clue. Situations get really nasty when I remember though :)

Although I dont have an answer to the mystery of memory, yet in the pursuit of understanding the mystery, I have understood myself. I am a man of instinct and intuition. I am right here, right now.

It has helped me keep focus on the things that I loved doing. It has helped me concentrate on my work for longer hours. Most importantly, it has shielded me from all the bad memories that I have accumulated from the past 36 years. The burden of those memories would have killed me, or made me a different person altogether.

I have been a blank page through out my life. I am lovin' it.

(Now that I am writing this blog about memory, I am flooded with bad memories. I hope I forget them as quickly as possible)

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Living with myself!

As we grow, we come out of our cushy childhood to face the world around us. The world initially starts from peer pressure in the classroom, slowing expanding its influence to the school level.

By the time, we pass our board exams, we are experienced in handling anxiety, failure, expectations, and many such complicated emotions. We also start taking decisions with varied consequences affecting our existence.

We move from decisions like stealing a chocolate from the fridge to decisions like not talking to a particular friend in the class. We then graduate to decisions about which girl to like, and get infatuated. Every little or big decision has little or big emotional consequences.

Life starts and just wont stop at anything till we die. Every morning starts a day of living life fulfilling wishes, self expectations, greed, ambitions and other egotistical fancies. We go on taking decisions one way or the other. Sometimes we are compelled to take a particular decision.  Sometimes we decide to not decide. That's also a decision with consequences.

Finally comes a time, when we are living the consequences more than our lives. Today, I mostly take decisions to live through consequences of past decisions. Hardly I take new decisions. I neither have the time nor the guts.

I realise that I am going through a phase of wasting time pondering over what is happening, or what has happened. I ought to rather spend time to build a happy present and a better future. It is restricting and frustrating. How to run away? Meditation? Perhaps Yoga? Perhaps seclusion? I don't think death is an alternative.

I know it is a feeling that it is in the mind. It is finally the question, "Am I the world, or am I just myself?" The Jains take diksha by leaving every material comfort including relatives and immediate family. The yogis too roam around alone.

I realise we are all actually ourselves. I am actually just myself. I close my eyes and try to imagine the meaning of 'I am Me. I am just myself'. It is a nice liberating feeling. I am just myself makes me imply that 'the others are just themselves'. We both are mutually exclusive, not related at all. We have to just co-exist without harming each other. I also understand and accept the fact that I can't control others' thoughts, words and actions.

I also realise that I have only 'Today'. There is neither time nor need to mull over the consequences that have piled up on me over the years either subliminally or in full contrast.

Today I take another decision. But this is a new decision by me, for me, about me.

I will live for myself.

I would concentrate on my dreams. I will do my part and leave the rest to chance, and not to 'others'. I will not sulk, as most often than not, we sulk for others' actions, which are anyways, not in our control. I will be nice and courteous to others, as they are others and shouldn't be taken for granted.

Living for myself is mainly about a list of things that I want to do. It is about not getting distracted by past consequences and by 'others' actions.

Today I decide to be happy about myself, without the 'others'.

What is a Safer City for Women?

Mumbai has been the safer city for women according to my discussions with my female friends. The arguments in favour of the statement ranges from 'one can party till late', 'one can come home from office in odd hours', 'one can wear short skirts without being leered and cheered at', to 'one doesn't care about what the other girl is up to'.

I was reading a blogpost today by an extremely popular blogger (by the count of comments she receives on her posts) on the same topic that led me to think of defining a 'safer place for women'.

Mumbai surely figures as one the safest city in my list too because of the financial independence it gives to women. Women love the city because, for a change, she is not the object of discussion for whatever she does.

Similarly the North-East is safe for women because of the social status it gives to women. The hill states particularly are known for their matrilineal societies and women play a very significant role, that creates safety for women in general. Assam has had the privilege of a great Guru - Srimanta Sankardeva, who preached a class-less society and had given a modern outlook to the society by reducing the influence of Brahmins and their traditions. Many of the Brahmin traditions like Widow Marriage, Sati Pratha are not to be seen in Assam.

However, both these places have de-merits. If Mumbai gives loneliness and depression, the NE states are economically poor to give options towards financial independence.

Safest city or a place for woman is not to be judged by the time of night, she can come home. It is to be judged by the freedom and support that place gives her. That place has to be her immediate family - her home. Home is the place that can make her take efforts to:

• understand herself, and how different or similar she is to her society.
• crystalize her ambitions, likes and dislikes in order to lead her adult life
• form her concepts of feminity, society and financial independence

It is the home that brings up a woman to understand and realise her own safety zones. She might not feel safe in her own house, or on the other extreme, she might not want to be outside home till late hours irrespective of whether she feels safe outside or not.

She might enjoy being a house-wife and feel safe at a city where joint family and society plays an intrinsic role (inter-ferring at times), unlike Mumbai where we don't even know our neighbours.

There is no safer city for women, as compared to the any other city. It is completely upon the woman on what she considers safe.

Blogger or Wordpress cannot bring all the women to one platform to search for opinions, but for sure, Mumbai or any other place for that matter, would not win the majority votes.

Dedication, My friends, thats the key

Its a debate about brilliance and dedication. And you know what, dedication is what that will take you to your dreams.

Dedication is not one word. It is a combination of many words. It is the sum of discipline, focus, passion, hard-work, planning and punctuality.

Brilliance would give you the brain cells to understand concepts, remember facts and interpret conclusions. It would also give you curiosity and distraction.

Getting distracted is the key to failure.

There, you need dedication. And all the words that come with dedication. Brilliance cant be exclusive of dedication.

Dedication is however independent of brilliance. Read any of the autobiographies of successful brilliance.

Focus, plan and dedicate your life to your dreams, and your passion. You will get to your life of contentment.

Oi Moti! Good Morning... Parents beware!

It was a revelation when I saw how care-free kids are when it comes to giving nick-names. It was when I had gone to drop my kid to the school bus, did I realise the plight of obese kids.

Calling someone Moti or Mot'e comes without much thought for kids. I wonder how that affects the confidence of the kids who are obese. It is worrisome that we see so many obese kids these days without enough sports, and with access to junk food.

It is a call to all those parents who are feeding their kids with no abandon. Parents may be sending their kids into a depressive shell, in the guise of giving love and providing for the kids. Parents need to realise the mental and physical trauma that the kids would go through, once they develop a habit of eating too much.

Introducing the consciousness of sports and fitness early in one's life not only help the kid stay healthy, but also teaches him/her team spirit and how to manage oneself (self-sufficient) in a group of people.

Parents beware! We eat to live. We dont live to eat.

Why this Blog?

I think I have an extremely curious, logical mind that questions everything in sight. At the same time I am very perceptive to nature. I find that plants love me, dogs and cats love me, kids love me and more importantly I can relate to them. I can talk to them.

I have always questioned conventional thinking and that strangely makes me scared to go to doctors. Most of them are just applying what had been written without understanding much. This is true for most of us in our respective fields. We apply knowledge and logic at face value.

There are millions of instances when a father does not feed water to the kid when the kid is having loose motion or worse, diarrhoea. Logically, to the father, it will only increase the frequency of the kid's toilet visits.

There are instances when a doctor does not remember the amount of tetanus vaccine to be administered into the muscle. Once, this is real, the doctor had actually injected 5 ml into the muscle of another doctor, as the other doctor had a rat bite !! Imagine 5 ml of foreign liquid in a dense tissue body like the muscle. Even if we don't consider the poisonous nature of our vaccines in higher doses, the 5 ml will pain that muscle part for hours like mad. It is common logic that anything to be injected in muscle cannot be more than .5 ml or even lesser. 

I have issues with these kinds of thinking.

And then there are so many questions that need deeper understanding: why do we itch? why do we sweat and our under-arms smell? why does a kid cry? how to understand our own body? Why does Baba Ramdev's breathing techniques work? etc etc ... and a million etcs

I am not a doctor. I am not qualified to write this blog. However, going by the freedom of expression I enjoy and your logic to take/assimilate whatever you feel logical from this blog, I have taken up to write my understanding about Our Body. Our Mind. And Many Mysteries.